Back to School: Conquering Transition Stress

By: Elise Abromson, Psy.D.

Going back to school can be an exciting and scary time for many children and teens. This may be the year your child transitions from elementary to middle school or from middle school to high school. These transitions can be stressful and anxiety provoking. Many children do not know what to expect in a new school. They worry about the schoolwork as well as the peers they will face. Even if they are returning to the same school they may have some back to school jitters. Here are some ways that parents can help their children make a smooth transition from summer to back to school. 

• Start talking with your child early about their concerns and also what they are exciting about for the upcoming year. This will allow you enough time to address their concerns and take action when needed. Encourage your child to be open with you about their worries and not to be embarrassed by them. 

• If your child is transitioning to a new school speak with the principal to set up a time for your child to look around the school before everyone gets there. If possible, bring his or her class schedule and help him or her find his or her classrooms. Orientations can be overwhelming; seeing the school without as many people there makes it a less intimidating experience. Many children also find it helpful just to drive to the school and stand outside the building to get used to it. 

• Encourage your child to call peers he or she knows from his or her previous school and set up a time to meet and go to school together. Children feel better approaching a new situation if they have someone there with them and have their peers as support. They also begin to feel as though they are not in it alone. If your child does not know anyone, speak with the school counselor or principal and look into getting your child a "student buddy" that may be able to show him or her around. 

• Get your child back on a school schedule BEFORE school starts! Do not wait until the night before to send your child to bed earlier. The combination of nerves, excitement, and a new schedule can be a recipe for a sleepless night and a tough first day. Try to begin the school schedule about a week in advance. 

• Create a sense of excitement! Go back to school shopping for clothes and school supplies. Make a family day out of it so your child does not dread going back! Help them pick out their clothes for the first day and pack up their backpacks. Give them a special lunch for the first day that will result in a smile on their face (feel free to include a note as an added bonus!)!

• Look on the school's webpage before school starts to find information about clubs, sports, and other after school activities in which your child may be interested. Make sure he or she knows when, where, and how to sign up for the activities. Activities are also a great way for children to meet new people and feel happier in school. 

• Of course, always encourage your child to come to you should he or she experience any difficulties during the year. Letting them know you are there for them is so important, as they may need support throughout the year.

This article addresses typical school worries. There are other issues that factor into back to school time that are more serious. Bullying and school anxiety are just a few. If your child is experiencing more intense emotions about school it may be necessary to seek professional help.